I haven't posted in a while as I got a new job. It's been a journey as I go through the steep learning curve and caseload volume I have received. There were a couple weeks that I had come to a point where I didn't think I could do it anymore. I recognized it was the current circumstances and not the norm, but that doesn't change the reality of my feelings. It's slightly better now, but that is more due to the fact that God has been telling me that He is in control and I need to turn to Him.
Thank you so much for your prayers! In Nepal, God tried teaching me that He was my Sustainer and to rely on Him not just for His promises for me in the future, but also for the day to day life. I'm learning the hard way now that I didn't learn it well in Nepal. Through this process and the many people in my life that have been incredible supportive and praying for me, I'm learning that when I get overwhelmed - I need to turn to Jesus. It isn't that I wasn't before, but I am learning that in any and all new situations I need to be better about turning to Him first.
God has shown me that He is in control of what is going on now, the promises He has given me for the future, how He has directed my past, and that He has released me from some guards He had put in my life. Yesterday I realized my anxiety of something was no longer there because He has released me from that guard. I'm still a little nervous about it 'cause that guard has been in place for a long time and it's kind of new waters for me. I wonder if my thoughts are just due to the past or God is at work and answering my prayers for change if something is in His will.
Continue to pray for me that I will seek God for His wisdom and be sensitive to what He is saying.
This song just popped into my head, so I'll end with it!
My heart is glad that You've called me Your own. There's no place I'd rather be
Than In Your arms of love, in Your arms of love
Holding me still, holding me near
In Your arms of love