My status on Facebook at one point mentioned how I was coming to an end of an era or something similar. I posted that while I was thinking about my epic death for my healer character in Pathfinder. Since I'm going away and we already have more than enough characters, the DM asked if I'd be ok with my character being killed. I told him I wanted an epic death...which is what occurred on Saturday. My character died from a laser beam that zapped my strength 4 levels and was eaten by an aberration, in case anyone wanted to know. The DM was extremely nice and turned my abilities into a self recharging staff so the rest of the party wouldn't be without some sort of healing.
On that side note (and why I picked the title for this blog), my church prayed over me this Sunday. My pastor asked me to tell what I would be doing over in Nepal. I felt that I should talk about what Stew and Vee wrote in their blog that I linked to a bit ago. Essentially, I'm going under the health sector, but one point of the Peace Corps is living amongst my community, recognising what is needed, and helping them start a project to meet that need.
Did I say that? No. I went with the "safe" answer of working with women and children health to help with nutrition. It's true...but not real explicit on how I come into play and doesn't really encapsulate my purpose as a future Peace Corps volunteer. What was the sermon on? How like the Good Samaritan, we should get involved when we see a need. :-P
I'm definitely not comparing myself to the Good Samaritan, but I certainly kicked myself for not listening to my first thought. Hence the title - A Time To Die. I am no longer going to doubt myself when I feel the Holy Spirit. I am going to stop having a spirit of timidity, but be more like Titus. It's certainly going to be a process, but it's time for me to be strong in the Lord rather than rely on my own strength. (One of the reasons I was keen on doing the Peace Corps anyways)
At my going away party, I discovered things about myself I hadn't realised people thought about me. Good things, but it caught me off guard because I just hadn't looked at it from their perspective. Even though my focus isn't where I want it to be all the time, it seems God still sees my heart and blesses others in spite of my self centeredness. :-) Scripture tells us this (I'm fairly certain), but I'm glad to see it in my life because my heart truly does just want to serve and love others.
I said goodbye yesterday morning to someone I consider my sister. I started tearing up, realising it was goodbye for awhile and ever since we've known each other, we've still seen each other at least once a year. She told me that it was only 27 months and we'd see each other after. It made me feel better to think that even though it IS a bit of time.
I packed one bag mostly up and went to my last game day...even though I still had two more to go and a few other things to do. This group let me hang out with them when I desperately needed a place where I could get a breather from my life at the time and I will forever be grateful for them letting me continue despite my terrible strategies and math.
I've now packed most of my stuff as a preliminary trial and it's actually not going that badly. What IS going badly is my ability to sleep during the nighttime! Despite my huge sleep debt, tiredness still eludes me which is why I decided now was the time to post this blog.
The time has come for my living in the States to end just like it has come for an end to everything else previously mentioned. But the end of something also means something new will be starting...and that is exciting! Although at the moment - I'm dwelling on the endings. Maybe once I've caught up on sleep, I'll be able to focus on where I'm going next!